The FOCCUS (Facilitating Open Couple Communication, Understanding, and Study) inventory is a pre-marriage assessment tool widely used in Catholic marriage preparation. Each partner answers a series of statements independently, and the results highlight where you agree, where you disagree, and where important conversations still need to happen. It’s not a pass/fail test – it’s a tool for honest dialogue before you stand at the altar.
The Deeper Story
I’ll be honest: most couples feel a little nervous about marriage assessments. There’s a fear that some quiz will tell you that you’re not compatible, or that a priest will say you can’t get married. That’s not what FOCCUS does. It’s designed to open conversations, not shut them down.
The FOCCUS inventory covers key areas like communication, conflict resolution, finances, family of origin, sexuality, faith, and expectations about children. Research has shown that couples who complete structured pre-marital assessments report higher satisfaction and lower conflict in their marriages. The Catholic Conference of Marriage Preparation Ministry references both the FOCCUS Pre-Marital Inventory (Williams & Jurich, 1995) and the Prepare/Enrich Inventories (Olson & Olson, 1999) as validated tools for this purpose.
At FAFE, we encourage couples in the courtship stage to “consider taking a marriage compatibility assessment (e.g., FOCCUS, PREPARE/ENRICH)” as part of their discernment – not because love isn’t enough, but because love deserves to be informed. The Catechism reminds us that the matrimonial covenant is “by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring.” Understanding each other deeply before you enter that covenant isn’t unromantic – it’s responsible.
What This Means for Your Dating Life
If you’re engaged or approaching engagement, ask your parish about the FOCCUS inventory. Most dioceses include it in their marriage preparation process. When you take it, be completely honest – the value is in the truth, not in getting the “right” answers.
Pay special attention to the areas where you and your partner disagree. Those aren’t red flags by default – they’re invitations to have conversations you might have been avoiding. A skilled facilitator can help you navigate those differences before they become patterns in your marriage.
Where to Go from Here
Contact your parish to learn which pre-marital assessment they use and when to begin. If you’re still dating, you don’t need a formal inventory yet – but you can start having the honest conversations now. The habit of truthful dialogue is the real preparation.