Every February 14th, store shelves overflow with heart-shaped boxes and red roses, but beneath the commercial veneer lies a powerful truth: Saint Valentine’s Day began with a martyr for the faith, and it has never been solely about romantic love. The historical Saint Valentine gave his life for Christ, embodying the ultimate gift of self. This Valentine’s Day, let’s reclaim the deeper meaning of this feast and celebrate love in all its beautiful forms.

The Gift of Self: Love Made Visible

This Valentine’s Day, practice the gift of self by sharing expressions of your love and appreciation with those around you. It doesn’t require grand gestures or expensive gifts. Sometimes the most powerful expressions of love are the simplest:

  • A handwritten note to a friend telling them why they matter to you
  • A phone call to a family member you haven’t spoken to in a while
  • Making someone’s favorite meal
  • Offering words of affirmation to those who feel unseen
  • Acts of service that lighten someone else’s burden

These small gestures reflect what the Catholic Church calls agape—selfless, sacrificial love that seeks the good of the other. When we give of ourselves in these ways, we mirror Christ’s own love for us.

The Greatest Love of All

Don’t forget the greatest love of all—the one that comes from God himself—and spend time nurturing that love relationship. Before we can properly love others, we must understand how deeply we are loved by our Creator.

The Catholic tradition recognizes several distinct types of love, each reflecting a different facet of how God designed us to connect:

  • Agape (ἀγάπη): The selfless, unconditional love of God for us, and the charity we’re called to show others. This is the love that sent Christ to the cross.
  • Eros (ἔρως): Romantic, passionate love between spouses. This love, sanctified in marriage, is meant to be life-giving and reflects God’s passionate love for the Church.
  • Philia (φιλία): The love of friendship, companionship, and mutual affection. This is the love between friends who journey together.
  • Storge (στοργή): Familial love and natural affection, like the bond between parents and children or siblings.

When we spend time in prayer, receive the sacraments, and simply rest in God’s presence, we’re nurturing the relationship that makes all other love possible.

Learning to Love Yourself: A Personal Journey

I want to share something deeply personal. When I was divorced and single, mourning a broken relationship, I faced a profound question: Could I love myself the way God loves me?

In that season of heartbreak, I started a simple tradition: I began buying myself flowers. It sounds small, but it was revolutionary. I learned to lean into self-care—not as selfishness, but as stewardship of the person God created me to be. I discovered that loving yourself isn’t narcissism; it’s recognizing your inherent dignity as a beloved child of God.

Self-love isn’t about pride or vanity. It’s about accepting God’s love for you and treating yourself with the same compassion and care you’d show a dear friend. As Jesus commanded, “Love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:39)—which assumes a proper love of self rooted in understanding your worth in God’s eyes.

Love in All Its Forms

Love has many different forms, and Valentine’s Day is a beautiful opportunity to celebrate all of them.

Whether you’re married or single, in a relationship or searching, surrounded by family or far from home, this day belongs to you. It’s a day to celebrate:

  • The couple married for fifty years
  • The single person thriving in their vocation
  • The parent exhausted but overflowing with love for their children
  • The friend who shows up when it matters most
  • The person learning to love themselves after heartbreak
  • The God who loved us first and loves us always

In the End, Love Wins

Saint Valentine died for love—love of Christ, love of truth, love of the faith. His witness reminds us that love is not a sentiment but a decision, often a costly one. And yet, it’s the only thing worth giving our lives to.

This Valentine’s Day, whatever your relationship status, whatever heartbreaks you’ve endured or joys you’ve celebrated, remember this: Love wins. Not the hollow, commercialized version of love, but the real thing—messy, sacrificial, faithful, and true.

Love that comforts the lonely. Love that forgives the unforgivable. Love that celebrates with those who rejoice and weeps with those who mourn. Love that points us always back to the One who is Love itself.

So buy yourself those flowers. Call that friend. Thank your family. Spend time with God. Celebrate love in all its forms.

Because in the end, love—true love, God’s love—always wins.

Happy Saint Valentine’s Day. May you know how deeply you are loved.